Papa, can you hear me?

This song struck a chord in me when I heard it on Glee... And it's sung so well by Lea Michelle. Her voice just suits this song.

untitled

This is a poem written a few years ago by someone who wishes to remain anonymous.




Love me
Don't love me I can only feel love


Respect me
Don't respect me for I do not need respect


Baby me
Do not call me a baby


See me as a man
I do not wish to be a man


Treat me as a man
I do not wish to grow up


Mother me
I resent my mother


I love women
I hate women


Care for me
I do not care


Be in charge of me
I hate being controlled


Be responsible for our
I hate you for trying to have control in your life


Leave me alone, give me space
Keep me company


make love show love give love
I screw, I receive, I accept


Be angry with me so I may appease you
Do not be angry with me


Be happy with my appeasement
I hate being forced to appease


You hate appeasement
Be happy that I appease you




Trust me
For I lie to you


Let me lie to you
Do not call me a liar




Be happy with me
Your happiness is not my problem


I demand to be the centre of us as two
There is only room for me in our centre


It's always all about me
Do not see me


I Am Legend
Do not re-tell that story


Do not let your unhappiness affect me
Aren't you happy?


I want you to be happy
I have no care for your happiness


Heal me
I do not recognize you need healing


Help me
You do not need any help


Hear me
Don't believe what I say


Satisfy me
You do not need needs


Feel sorry for me
I am not sorry


Love me
I do not understand love


Give me love
I do not give love


Have hope for me
You do not need hope


Wait for me to catch up with you
I hate that you walk in front of me


Trust me
Decieve me


See me as a husband
I do not protect you


I love you
I hate you, resent you, blame you, trick you


Be a woman
You do not need femininity


We are married
I do not keep vows.

Tha Chasm

An original.

Between You and Me

There is a Chasm of Colour

They swirl and Mix together

And sometimes They Seperate

Like Oil and Water

But the deeper You go

Into the Depths of the Chasm

The Darker it gets

And some Things are Lost

Howdy :3

Don't worry, "readers",
Haven't forgotten! Just been super busy, especially this past month!
Here's an awesome song to keep you happy: Snuff by Slipknot. <3

4 bridges art festival in TN!

Last weekend there was an art festival that my mother, sister and I managed to crash. It was pretty awesome.
And I bought my first original piece of art!!! [It's super exciting for me, so sshhhhhhut up!!]

The artist's name is Kyle, and he's a photographer. I like his style where he finds something interesting in things that people normally don't look at twice. It's a gift.

I bought this photo mainly because it's a skull. They are kind of my obsession. But it was this one or one of the Eiffel Tower with the sky as a backdrop, and I couldn't decide which one. This one won, though. [His choice].

He has plenty more photos on his website: kylespears.com so go and check it out! There are some really awesome ones, and some... interesting ones. There's also this one of a girl with a grey/blue painted face which is a personal favourite.

Aside from Kyle's photos, there were also a ton of other amazing peices of art throughout the festival. One where someone had turned normal firepits into awesome firepits, some amazing glasswork of angels and trees - now THOSE were amazing! I wish I'd taken photos of them, but I thought it would be a bit rude... Orignal paintings, sculptures, 3-D paintings - if you can make something out of something, it was there.

*sigh*

It was awesome. I love art festivals. :)

Wear Your Seatbelt

Love Don't Roam

I've been a Doctor Who addict since the start of the revival, back in the day when [hottie] Christopher Eccelston was the Ninth Doctor. And then when [even hotter] David Tennant became the Tenth Doctor, well, I just couldn't tear myself away from the series! I think he is the one that makes Doctor Who so popular these days. I love the thing between him and Rose, and everytime - no joke, everytime - I watch "Doomsday" I cry my eyes out.
So then I went online and bought all of the series' soundtracks, because the composition is pretty much awesome. Listening to the tracks, I inevitably came across the surprisingly upbeat song, written by Murray Gold, "Love Don't Roam" sung by Neil Hannon, whose voice weirdly fits the song. This song, as well as the other vocal tracks on the albums, is about Rose and the Doctor, but I love this particular song because it's so sad.
[I'm a sucker for sad and depressing things.]
It's a song about a person who is tired of travelling even though he has met many different people and seen and done some amazing things, but after everything, he is still alone in the world. Desperate for compaionship, he asks a certain girl to stay and be his constant in a world that is full of variables and is constantly changing.
Enjoy a fanvid I found through Youtube [it was the best one out there to this song]. I don't own any rights to anything in this particular post, except for my own opinion... :]

Well, I've roamed about this Earth
With just a suitcase in my hand,
And I've met some bog-eyed Joe's,
I've met the blessed, I've met the damned.
But of all the strange, strange creatures
In the air, at sea, on land,
Oh, my girl, my girl, my precious girl,
I love you, you understand.


So, reel me in, my precious girl,
Come on, take me home.
'Cause my body's tired of travelling
And my heart don't wish to roam. No, no.


I have wandered, I have rambled
I have crossed this crowded sphere,
And I've seen a mass of problems
That I long to disappear.
Now, all I have's this anguished heart,
For you have vanished too.
Oh, my girl, my girl, my precious girl,
Just what is this man to do?


So, reel me in, my precious girl,
Come on, take me home.
'Cause my body's tired of travelling
And my heart don't wish to roam.


Yeah, reel me in, my precious girl,
Come on, take me home.
'Cause my body's tired of travelling
And my heart don't wish to roam. No, no.


Well, you took me in, you stole my heart,
I cannot roam no more.
Because love, it stays within you,
It does not wash up on a shore.
But a fighting man forgets each cut
Each knock, each bruise, each fall,
But a fighting man cannot forget
Why his love don't roam no more.


Oh, reel me in, my precious girl,
Come on, take me home.
'Cause my body's tired of travelling
And my heart don't wish to roam.


Yeah, reel me in, my precious girl,
Come on, take me home.
'Cause my body's tired of travelling
And my heart don't wish to roam.


Yeah, walk with me, my love, my love,
Walk tall, walk proud, walk far,
For you know my love, you are, you are,
You are my shining star.


Walk with me, oh my love,
Walk tall, walk proud, walk far.
For you know my love, you are, you are,
You are my shining star, you are.
Yeah!


Reel me in, my precious girl,
Come on, take me home.
My body's tired of travelling
And my heart don't wish to roam.

A Message for Mr Lopez

Happy summer days to everyone in the nothern hemisphere :)
So, 25-odd years ago in New Zealand, 1984, a young girl by the name of Sacha was killed in a drink-drive accident. She was a passenger in a car that was hit head-on by a Chile diplomat, who went on to claim diplomatic immunity and was quickly flown out of the country. He was taken back to Chile and no justice has ever been served for this family who lost a daugher just a month shy of her 21st birthday. The poem was written by the partner of her father, Carol in 2009, who saw how the crash devastated the family. The poem was then sent on to the Chile government, where they have formerly and officially apologized and offered to have a memorial service for Sacha which is going to be held in May.

So this is for Sacha 1963 - 1984

A message for Mr Lopez

I was in Santiago the other day,

Mr Lopez, first time in my life,

And I was intending to look you up.

I'm not sure what I would have said

if I'd knocked on your door and found

you home. If a woman, your wife or

even a daughter, had called over

the balcony or the intercom ¿hola?

You see, Mr Lopez, I'm not sure

what I want from you any more.

The phone directory has many Lopez

as you of course would know -

they're rare where I come from - but just three listed as Luis Felipe.

Perhaps you're all related: elderly father,

your eldest son and you, Mr Lopez,

the diplomat. Are you still an embassy

man or did you switch your line

of work after the immunity wore off?

I'd been rehearsing our meeting

all these years but, somehow I got

to Chile and my heart wasn't in it.

What was I going to say to you:

Hi, Mr Lopez, I'd like a word

about my daughter?

Would it hurt if I told you she was

twenty, tall and beautiful, unsure

as some striking people are,

and gifted, an artist with a promising

future. Paintings are all I have.

Hi, Mr Lopez, I could have said,

I'm the father of the girl you killed

when you drove dead-drunk

in a new car in a new country

on the wrong side of a road.

Would it hurt if I told you, last time

I saw her, I promised her oil paints

for Christmas and watched her small plane

until it was just a speck in a summer sky.

You! You crossed the centre line

a third time, saw the headlights and

swerved - not to the left, your side

of the road, which might have

saved her - but to the right,

Luis Felipe Lopez, to the right.

Hi, Mr Lopez, I could have said

in Santiago, please step outside,

I'm going to kill you.

They missed you at the inquest.

The coroner's man couldn't get

Sacha's name right - he called her

'Sacka', as if she were a sack of nothing -

but he had yours down pat.

I have one daughter left alive.

On birthdays and death days

and in the early mornings, you are

not far from our thoughts, Luis -

can I call you that? I wonder if

the 'car accident', fool phrase,

wrecked your life as it did ours.

What price did you have to pay,

loyal servant of General Pinochet,

for slaughter in a foreign city?

When you hug your own daughter,

do you sometimes think of Sacha.

I sat on the bed in my hotel room

in your city ringed with mountains,

three likely numbers in my hand, and

I knew it was over. To tamp down

my bitterness, concentrate my sadness,

I tried to put myself in your shoes,

to imagine what it must be like

to be a killer. I tried but I cannot.

No, Luis Felipe Lopez,

I do not want to see your face.

Big Sister!

A big birthday shout out to my older sister who turned 23 a few days ago!!
Hope it was a good birthday, and I hear the party was huge!
Love you forever and always xxx

Call me a gingerbread [wo]man!

Ah, the freedom of running, where the only things that bound you are your own physical limits and gravity! Althought sometimes your own limits can be broken... And that is a serious bliss that only runners/athletes can appreciate!
I'm going back into running and it's amazing! I can't believe I waited so long to get back into it!! And running with people [that you want to run with] make each run SO much better than just running alone. And the addition of music is also good, especially if it's good music. [Linkin Park, Disturbed, All that Remains, Breaking Benjamin, My Chemical Romance, System of a Down...]
There is just nothing like be able to run and, as weird as it sounds, have some peace and quiet, despite the music in your ears.

Emotional Masturbation

Before I commence with this poem, the title was inspired by my mum who mentioned the term. I love it - it has so much meaning than a sexual connotation. And so here goes.
An original poem done [rough draft of course]:


Emotional Masturbatiaon


Like an addict
You get off on your addiction
But this drug is worse
Than any pill or powder
You get off on life
At the expense
Of those around you
Just like an addict
But the gap closes between fixes
And so
At the expense of others
You grind them down
And strip the emotions from them
You take great pleasure at having
The power to tear people down
The climax you reach
Is seeing them vulnerable
At having them see
You shudder in the simpleness
Of it all
And then you go
Back to your acting
Waiting and waiting
For the next
Orgasmic moment


[March 11 2010]

Hand of Sorrow

One of my best friends got me into the band, Within Temptation last August, and I regret it deeply.
Why?
Because I can't stop listening to their album, The Heart of Everything, that's why!! It's a really awesome album, and I love the mix of gothic rock with symphonic stuff + bass guitar, and the lead singer's voice.
Not to mention the lyrics are simply amazing!
And she was surprised I took such a strong liking to the group, because they are a Christian rock group. This surprised me, so I looked at their lyrics while listening to their songs, and suddenly the lyrics made some sense. I'm not a religious nut or anything, but I love these guys.
So, here's one of my favourite songs, "Hand of Sorrow":

The child without a name grew up to be the hand

To watch you, to shield you or kill on demand

The choice he'd made he could not comprehend

His blood a grim secret they had to command

He's torn between his honor and the true love of his life

He prayed for both but was denied

So many dreams were broken and so much was sacrificed

Was it worth the ones we loved and had to leave behind?

So many years have past, who are the noble and the wise?

Will all our sins be justified?

The curse of his powers tormented his life

Obeying the crown was a sinister price

His soul was tortured by love and by pain

He surely would flee but the oath made him stay

He's torn between his honor and the true love of his life

He prayed for both but was denied

So many dreams were broken and so much was sacrificed

Was it worth the ones we loved and had to leave behind?

So many years have past, who are the noble and the wise?

Will all our sins be justified?

Please forgive me for the sorrow, for leaving you in fear

For the dreams we had to silence, that's all they'll ever be

Still I'll be the hand that serves you

Though you'll not see that it is me

So many dreams were broken and so much was sacrificed

Was it worth the ones we loved and had to leave behind?

So many years have past, who are the noble and the wise?

Will all our sins be justified?

Remember...

I just wanted to acknowledge the earthquakes that hit Haiti and Chile. This year alone, there have been over 20 major earthquakes, making it the most activity-filled year so far, in a very long time.
If anyone reads this, I urge - and beg - you to go oneline and find a place to donate. My work has a Haiti fund which, with every donation, matches that donation. 

Chile has also been devastated by an earthquake and so please remember these people and what they are all going through as you curl up in your warm bed and sleep comfortably with a full belly.

Furlough Days

Here is a poem written by one of my best friends, Mary Beth. She's basically a bunch of awesomeness and hunour mixed with a splash of weirdnes. Perfectness.


Furlough Days


There seems to be no solution
To this pollution
This mind fuck of information
This constant sensation
Caused by each generation
That’s affecting the whole nation
Nothing to be done by politicians
With their tall tales of fiction
It’s worse than an addiction
Cause there is no fixation
No single dictation
Or calculation
That can fix these relations
But here I come with this proclamation
And dedication
To help our education
There is no reason to write this dissertation
Besides to voice my frustration
About these fake fabrications
When they are truly devastations
Seen as inevitable extinction
Why is no one seeing with clear vision?
The need to take action
Is the right kind of reaction?
And to come to a new destination
Have some better comprehension
There should be no disorientation
For something with this duration
We’re filled with trepidation
This saddening expression
Is occupying my attention
But on occasion
There is fake jubilation
False elation
Undeserving celebration
This sort of flirtation
Without direction
They find relief in a contradiction
With increased inebriation
They create a worse situation
This unwanted alcoholic association
That creates stereotypes affecting the whole schools population
There is not a single notion
In my hearts palpitations
That this subjugation
Will ever have a solution

Hello Children!

I took this pic. Just saying.

My first blog of 2010 - I can't believe it's taken over a month to post anything!!

New Years was a blast, spending it with my awesome sister and a bunch of wonderful drunken fools. Since then, I've been going to class, working and hanging out with said bunch of drunken fools. A lot. 

This year I was hoping to get back into running and basically spending this year growing up a bit. Shall be fun, with a challenge to beat someone running 2 miles around a lake next week. If I lose, then I buy him a 12 pack of beer. If he loses, I get $10 gas money - it was an offer I couldn't pass up.

So, fingers out of noses, asses into gear and let's see what 2010 has to offer us!